Until my knees are weak

I read Psalm 109 today. Here are my thoughts.

Appoint a wicked man against him; let an accuser stand at his right hand. When he is tried, let him come forth guilty; let his prayer be counted as sin! -Psalms 109:6, 7

It always throws me when David starts praying for the destruction of his enemies. Is it Godly to pray like that? I don't know for sure. But I noticed a few things that were encouraging and made his prayers seem more legitimate.

I noticed that he is praying for God's justice, not his own vengeance! And that is righteous as far as I know. God says that vengeance is his, not ours. We are called to be loving always. David was loving to his enemies which we see in verse four.

In return for my love they accuse me, but I give myself to prayer. -Psalms 109:4

So he's praying for justice, but he's working hard to be loving to them because that is his responsibility. And it must be hard work! I can't imagine being rewarded evil from the ones I'm showing undeserved kindness to (verse 5).

I also noticed in verse 24 how he prays.

My knees are weak through fasting; my body has become gaunt, with no fat. -Psalms 109:24

This stood out to me since one of my focuses as of late has been prayer. When he prayed, he prayed fervently. He didn't pray like I usually do, which is to throw out my request once, maybe twice, and not anticipate much from God. If my prayer is answered, then that's great! But if not, I don't pray again and I'm not usually very disappointed.

There's something to be said for being content with Gods will when it doesn't match up with mine, but I've been considering if this is the only way to pray. Maybe we should pray until our knees are weak with fasting as if we truly anticipate God to show himself to us.

We should pray for discernment so that our prayers line up with Gods heart and dig I to his word which reveals his heart to us. After that, I'm beginning to think, we need to seriously pray for big things. We need to pray for specific opportunities to share the gospel, to see God work in our days, to learn something new about God, and for God to radically change us into someone who looks more like him. That's how I pray on mission trips, but my life should be one big mission trip if I truly believe what Scripture teaches.

And if you keep reading Psalms, it'll seem like David is always praying for relief from bad guys. They're usually chasing him and trying to kill him, or just mocking him. I wonder why God didn't give him relief after a few prayers. I don't really know. But what I do know is that David kept praying, he kept loving his enemies, and he continued to rejoice in The Lord!

Let them curse, but you will bless! They arise and are put to shame, but your servant will be glad! -Psalms 109:28

He tells The Lord that he will be glad! I love that. I need to be glad when I don't see answered prayer, but I need to keep praying if I think my prayers are in line with Scripture, until my knees are week.