Some big take aways:
Don't judge others or ride them off. Remember that everyone has a story and everyone hurts and struggles. This hit me hard when one of the girls I had written off as just unhappy and not really worth investing in because she would always act unhappy said she struggles with severe depression. She was working on finding balance this week. Even if it doesn't appear to make a difference, it wouldn't have done any damage to talk to her or smile at her even if I got little in return. It hurts me because I didn't just neglect to do those things, I also thought she was at fault for not being more energetic. I viewed every action of hers as a premeditated choice to be unhappy. There's more to depression than that. I know this from experience and yet it never crossed my mind that maybe there's more going on behind the scene.
I was reminded that we are role models. Chances are someone is watching me. Chances are someone admires me and wants to be like me. I don't mean to sound vain; that's not what this is about. It's a true thing that we neglect so often. Tonight, a girl said that she would rate herself a 4 on a 1-10 scale for how well she is serving God. And this girl is seriously amazing! Her faith is way stronger than mine was, she is always smiling, she is disciplined in devotions, she works very hard to be holy like Christ and it's very evident. She is the kind of girl who struggles with selfish thoughts on occasion but her actions exude selflessness, that kind of thing. A few girls offer her some encouragement to not beat herself up for not being perfect because she is exactly what God wants her to be and to be careful not to insult what God so carefully and beautifully created. Then one girl who is usually quiet starts to cry before she hardly begins to speak. She told the first girl who rated herself a 4 that she was her role model and that she wanted to be just like her. She said, "You wake up early to work out, so I want to do the same. You talk to new people at lunch, so I want to do the same." She said it hurts to hear her beat herself up so much because she looks up to her so much. That moment was so so powerful, I cried watching it. This girl who beats herself up reminds me of myself at times and it was so good to hear everyone's advice to her. People are watching and I need to be sure they see Jesus in me and not myself.
We have another girl who has been real straight up and open about the two-faced stuff in her life. She said she feels guilty around this group of girls because they are all fighting sin instead of just recognizing that it's there and it's wrong. I hope she will remember that and everything else she's learned when she gets home. I hope she actively fights sin in her life and remembers that she is not alone. We all struggle and a lot of us struggle with the same things! My goal is to keep up with her and be her accountability. I need to get her number tomorrow! Looking forward to this opportunity and praying that God will give me perseverance. I can give up on people who aren't growing or changing, but I want to be more diligent in my disciple making and more like Jesus. Jesus never gave up on me, he won't give up on her, so I pray I won't either.
Personally, I am learning balance in a lot of areas. If I were to give a theme to my life, it would be balance. It is the word I have prayed over the most. I have prayed for it on and off through different situations and for a long period of time. I've prayed for a sense of balance since 6th grade at least, if not earlier! I am learning how to approach mission trips in general, how to serve others, how to worship with the church, how to be one person all the time and also adapt to situations, and so much more. I've heard arguments against certain ways of doing ministry or certain ways of worshipping and I'm having to take all the things I've heard and take out the bad, put in the good, and recognize the negotiable/neutral.
Remember to be grateful always, and be thankful that you are alive. That's something I've learned from the people of New Orleans.
One more random note. A student said this tonight and I loved it. "Passion is powerful and it makes a difference." I'm striving to live a more passionate life.
No comments:
Post a Comment